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When was the last time that you said “I Love you” to your own image?  Have you ever stood in front of a mirror completely naked (physically, emotionally, and spiritually) and considered how miraculous you are?  Isn’t it interesting how we often tend to think of others when the phrase “love and intimacy” comes up?  We have been conditioned to expend energy and spend our resources learning how to be loving and intimate for other human beings.  However, we rarely receive teaching or empowerment in the topic of learning to passionately love ourselves.

We had a powerful conversation on our last episode of  The Chat, Chew and YOU show, a YouTube webcast that I co-host with a fellow wellness coach, Lakesha Brown.  Although February is typically seen as the romance month, we wanted to focus on self love first. On the CCY Show we believe in asking the hard questions, in order to get to our truth.  One of those hard questions last night was:  “How do we learn to love ourselves?” Our featured guest Misha Granado gave us some insight and ideas on where to begin with our self love relationship. A few of them were:

  • Ask yourself what expands you and what constricts you
  • Become an expert on yourself
  • Learn to sit with all of who you are and love it
  • Invest in getting the help you need to become a better version of yourself

There was a lot more yummy conversation that was shared around the challenge of learning to love ourselves.  If you missed it, no worries, you can watch the entire show here and see what resonates with you.


In the meantime I want to share some of the techniques that I use to strengthen my self-love.  I am blessed and thankful to be a woman who helps others heal their relationship with body and self.  However, I haven’t always been at peace with the woman in the mirror.  In the past I was a woman who lived in a place of self-loathing, body hate, low self esteem, and insecurity.  If you had asked me, ten years ago, to stand in the mirror and speak positively about myself I would have laughed at you from nervous amusement and then cried from embarrassment and shame. However, step by step I returned to Love with some of these practices:

  • I actively release guilt and shame
  • I release judgement of self and others
  • I embrace my flaws and imperfections as gifts
  • I embrace my “mistakes” as lessons and teachable moments
  • I tune into my heart’s desires and began to live them
  • I practice radical self expression
  • I prioritize “me” time

You see it can be done!  You can learn to connect with yourself in a loving and intimate way.  However, as we discussed in our conversation on The Chat, Chew, and YOU show there are two things you must know about the quest for self love:

  • It will not always be easy
  • You must show up and do the work

When you want to get to know someone and become close to them, you pursue them passionately.  How bad to you want to know the person in the mirror?

Share with me what thoughts and feelings came up for you after reading this.  Leave your comments below or contact me directly at: [email protected]

P.S. If you know a friend who needs to a little Love and intimacy in their life, give them a hand and forward this to them.

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Ivy LaArtista

The Body Relationship Coach at See Body. Love Self.™
Ivy Cooper, The Body Relationship Coach™ is a Certified Holistic Health Coach and Body Image Expert. She offers education, empowerment, and encouragement to help people build health, loving relationships with their body and self.

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