Have you ever felt like everyone around you was “MORE” than you? Maybe you felt like everyone else seems to be “MORE” informed, equipped, prepared, organized, established, successful, beautiful, or confident? I know I have before. It is easy to find ourselves in a state of self doubt and fear. Maybe you fear not being enough. Maybe you fear not having enough. Maybe you are like me and you have had to fight the feelings of inadequacy. I understand.
The truth is that you can be very “successful” according to societies standards and still feel inadequate. That is because those feelings of inadequacy are home grown. Yes, they come from your own thoughts and perspectives on yourself. You can experience material success, and show signs of external excellence, while still feeling internal lack of self confidence. How you feel about who you are has nothing to do with what you look like, what you own, or what you have accomplished. Think of some of the most popular celebrities who are considered to be rich and beautiful, that have also struggled with searching for happiness, Joy, and significance in their lives. No amount of possessions or fame could change how they see themselves or how they feel about themselves.
So how do you go from feeling inadequate to more self confident? How do you release the need for external validation and embrace a more positive view of yourself from the inside out? My answer to that is also my theme for 2015: “Rest in Your Knowing”. I received this message from Christie Inge a Holistic Lifestyle Coach and Energy Healer. I recently connected with Christie on a tele-class she conducted. I shared with her some anxiety that I was feeling around a task that I had to complete. We talked and she shared a lot of awesome wisdom with me (I can’t share it all now, but you can find her here and have your own experience). Out of everything that Christie said, the most resounding message for me was this simple phrase that she shared: “rest in your knowing”. She explained that I already have everything that I need within me. Ironically I already KNOW this, but speaking with Christie was my Divine reminder to release any doubts or fears. Sometimes a reminder is all we need.
Let me share my revelation and remembrance with you and let’s see if it resonates. Take a deep breath and open your heart to this opportunity to free your mind. You already KNOW that you are enough. You already KNOW that you are capable. You already KNOW that you have everything you need. You just need to REMEMBER. Somewhere along your life journey people, situations, and experiences caused you to forget just how powerful you really are. You started listening to external messages and cues. You started trusting other people’s evaluations, opinions, and beliefs of you. Then, you took them in as your own. Now you have rehearsed the thoughts so much, that you have embraced them as your truth and you conduct your life based on what you have embraced as truth. However, if you take a moment and ask yourself “where did that come from?” in regards to the things that you believe about yourself, you will realize what beliefs came from OUTSIDE of you. You will gain clarity around what you chose to bring INSIDE and make your beliefs about who you are. The fearful parts, brave parts, flawed parts, beautiful parts are all there for you to access at your will. You have what you need inside. You are enough.
So, I challenge you. Take a moment to write down the things that you think of yourself “good” and “bad”. Then, over the next few weeks, take your time and question where did those concepts come from? What made you think about yourself in that way? Is it YOUR truth or did it come from an external source? Here is an example:
Thought: “I am not good at public speaking. I do horrible talking to crowds”
Challenge The Thought: Am I really bad at public speaking? Am I comparing myself to others and trying to measure myself by their standards? Did I let an experience make me permanently afraid to speak? Do I need to practice on speaking and hone my abilities more? Am I worried about what others think of me when I speak, making me feel inadequate or anxious? If am not good at public speaking, so what? Does that diminish who I am?
What I Know: I have the ability to speak publicly, if needed. I can practice and hone my skills to become a better speaker if that is what I desire. I can seek professional assistance to get over anxieties. Even if I speak and mess up, I am will still be okay and I can still try again if I choose to. If I am not good at public speaking life will go on. I am still enough.
In 2015 I am embracing the theme “Rest in Your Knowing”. If I feel anxious about my skills, if I feel negative thoughts about my body, or anytime that I feel like I am anything less than enough I will reflect on my theme. Because sometimes we all forget and remembering is the healing part. I invite you to have your own experience too!
I’d love to hear your thought, questions, or ideas. Please feel free to comment below or email me privately:
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Ivy LaArtista
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